Back in the 1970s the teachers in our Baker school district went on strike. It was an ugly, polarizing time. I was taken aback when an older, teacher friend came to me and said, "I thought that you were on the other side, but I realize now that you weren't. I want you to know that I've forgiven you."

I was taken aback. I was speechless. I was puzzled.

In the first place I had worked hard to be impartial. I hadn't taken either side.

In the second place if the lady now knew that I wasn't ever on the enemy's side, of what did I need to be forgiven?

It was very confusing to me. She had misunderstood. I decided that the best thing for me to do would be to just ignore the whole incident. I haven't forgotten it, though, and I learned that I must be careful in my words, and to think about how I was coming across to people.

Our words are very important, and must be carefully watched and monitored. We can't risk being misunderstood. We must carefully analyze what we're saying, how we're saying it, and think about how it will be perceived.

Marjorie and I once had a misunderstanding, the only one we ever had.

I was in Japan, in the U.S. Navy. We had plans in place for our marriage as soon as my stint in Japan was finished. Then her family experienced a tragedy. The car of her brother-in-law was found in the Provo River, but his body could not be located. His wife and four children had to move back to Baker to live with her parents.

It was a very difficult time. I received a letter from Marjorie which said (and I quote), "One thing for sure, since this happened, I don't think we can be married too soon."

I was devastated. Why couldn't we go ahead with the marriage? What difference did his accident make? I wrote a reply expressing my disappointment, but also my willingness to wait if she didn't think we ought to get married just yet.

I then waited for two weeks for a reply to my letter. Marjorie had received my letter, and didn't know how to respond. "Why was James thinking that we shouldn't get married now? Where did he get that idea?" She puzzled over that for days. It required a personal revelation to her to straighten out the misunderstanding.

Where I had read in her letter, "One thing for sure, since this happened, I don't think we can be married too soon," she had said in her mind, "One thing for sure, since this happened, I don't think we can be married too soon!" She couldn't wait to get out of that melancholy atmosphere. Sometimes a comma or an exclamation point can completely change the meaning of a sentence.

I rejoiced when I finally received her explanation. We were able to get married on schedule, and have lived happily ever after.

Marjorie was the victim of another probable misunderstanding, the details of which can't even be remembered now, but from which I learned a great lesson because of the way that she handled it. She didn't tell me the story until years after the fact. At the weekday Primary another sister had made a derogatory or catty remark about Marjorie's family. It hurt her deeply, and she cried all the way home.

Here is the beautiful way that she handled it: Before arriving home, she determined that she wouldn't tell me about the incident because she knew that I'd have to do something about it, and whatever I did would be neither good nor helpful. She decided to not mention nor to even think about the incident. Because she didn't let her mind dwell upon the wrong that she'd experienced, she quickly forgot all about it. Years later she told me about the incident, but she had no idea what the comment even was. She did remember who the person was, however. We have spent many decades working closely with that woman and her husband. We have had the best of relationships, but that wouldn't have been the case if Marjorie had dealt with the issue in any other way. Those decades of amicability might otherwise have been decades of rancor.