By James E. Kerns

1999

 

Jamie was in, out of, under, and behind the chairs.  He was waiting for the doctor to come into the examination room.

And he was nervous.  He couldn't hold still.  He crawled under his dad's chair, thinking that he'd hide there from the doctor.

He slipped behind the big examination chair before the nurse came in.

"Where's Jamie?" she asked as she glanced around the room.  She had dealt with antsy little boys before, so at first she "didn't see" Jamie standing behind the big chair.  She looked under the other chairs and under the sink before she finally found him.

"You rascal," she said, as Jamie giggled and climbed into the high examination chair.

Jamie had been here before, and he'd be here many times more before his injured eye was fixed.  He knew the routine as well as the nurse did.

"Cover your right eye…Can you see the light?…Can you see my fingers?…Let's check your eye pressure…That's good…now for the eye drops…I wish all the little boys we see were as good and as responsive as you."

And then the nurse left.  Jamie and his mother and father waited for the doctor.  The doctor was nice, too, but sometimes after examining Jamie's eye, he'd say, "I'm sorry, but we're going to have to schedule some more surgery."

That's the part Jamie didn't like, and that's why he was nervous.

So Jamie ranged around the room.  He was careful not to touch things, but once as he went around the side of his chair, his hand touched a button that made the back of the chair lie down flat.

"That looks like a backhoe," Jamie said as he looked up at the big piece of equipment with the long arm beside his chair.

"What does that button do?" Jamie asked his daddy as he reached out toward three buttons on the wall behind Daddy's head.

"Oh, better not touch those," Daddy said.  "If you press that one, I think a long hole would open in the ceiling.  A big telescope would come out of that machine there, the lights would go off, and we'd be able to study the stars.—But it's not night yet."

"What does that button do?" Jamie asked, as he pointed to the second button.

"I'll bet that button would eject you right out through the roof if you were sitting in your chair," Mama answered.

 

"What does that button do?" Jamie asked, pointing at the third button.  "If I pressed it, would that wall open up on a green field with trees and a creek and horses?"

"Yes, it might," Daddy answered.  "That's the thing about buttons.  They change things.

"Some buttons turn on the light.

"Some buttons turn on machines that get work done, and some buttons open doors."

"What do these buttons do?" Jamie's guardian angel asked the Head Angel.

"Those are the buttons that need to be pushed when it's time to make big changes in Jamie's life," the Head Angel answered.

"This one is the 'Big Trial' button.  Everyone has to have at least one of these pushed in his life."

"Does it hurt?" asked Jamie's guardian angel.

"Yes, the Big Trial button always hurts," the Head Angel said, and everyone's Big Trial button is different, but it always makes the person a better person.  The Big Trial teaches the person things about himself that can't be learned in any other way."

"Do people always learn what they're supposed to learn from their Big Trial?" the guardian angel asked.

"Not always," the Head Angel said.  "That's what some of these other buttons are for.  If Jamie, for instance, and the people around him, handle his Big Trial with patience, faith and compassion, then there won't be any need to use some of these other buttons."

"Who pushes them?"

"You'll push some of them for Jamie when the time is right, other people will push some for him, but most of them he'll push himself."

"A person surely wouldn't purposely push a button that would cause himself pain," the guardian angel said.

"Oh, everyone does.  That's part of mortality, and of making choices and learning."

"Do pain and sorrow have a purpose?"

"The purpose of life is to bring all mankind to a state of happiness where they can experience joy.  It isn't possible to understand or experience happiness and joy without first experiencing pain and sorrow.  All of these things will be for Jamie's good, and neither he nor those around him will be given either more trouble or happiness than they can handle.  You see, we're trying to build Jamie up to where he can experience a fullness of joy."

"What do these other buttons do?"

"They're buttons that will open up opportunities and make major changes in Jamie's life.  This one is the 'Big Light' button.  It's to be pressed when a person is ready to understand life, himself, and how he fits into the eternal plan.  For some people we turn it on all at once—suddenly.  For Jamie it's going to be more like a dimmer switch that he'll turn on gradually.  He won't even remember a time when he didn't have light in his life.  That's because he's experiencing a Big Trial early."

"What does this button do?"

"That's the one that opens doors.  It will be pressed when Jamie is ready for his mission in life.  It will be pressed again when he's ready for marriage.  It will be pressed again when he wants an education and is wondering what vocation to choose.  He'll mostly press that button himself, but he'll need some prodding and guidance from us to get the timing right.

"And speaking of timing, it's time to press the Big Trial button," the Head Angel said.

"I wish we didn't have to.  He's so young," said Jamie's guardian angel.

"Remember, this will be good for him.  He'll handle it well, and this will make it so that the Big Trial button won't have to be pressed so many times for him.

"Besides that, missing an eye doesn't seem nearly as harsh as missing both legs like with Marianne."

"That's true," said Jamie's guardian angel, "but you said once that even though these things don't at first seem fair, it's amazing how even things turn out."

"That's right.  Life is tailor-made toward each person's needs.  Marianne and Jamie will each do fine.  It's those who refuse to be happy that make things hard for us.

"Here, watch the difference in attitudes between Jeremy and Paul.  They don't know each other, but they have the same, identical problem."

"Why me?" Jeremy yelled loudly.  "Why did this have to happen to me?"

"Well, why not me?" Paul told his mother.  "These things happen.  I'll just have to learn to live with it."

"OK, I see the difference," Jamie's guardian angel said.  "Jamie will be fun to work with.  I see that I need to count my own blessings.  I feel sorry for Jeremy's guardian angel.  He has his work cut out for him.

"My assignment is going to be a pleasure."